Should I Tell A Camgirl I Love Her?

This is a question that I know a lot of guys who frequent cam rooms have asked themselves. Should I tell a camgirl I love her? Obviously this blog entry is purely my own opinion, other models may very well think differently, though I am very curious to hear from other models about whether they agree or not. Feel free to comment with opinions or experiences!

Has It Happened To You?

I have had one guy in my camming career so far tell me that he loves me, and honestly, I saw it coming for a long time. In retrospect, I’m certain this member didn’t really ‘love’ me as he very quickly moved on from me after I’d had too much of his behaviour and had to let him go (you can read the full story here). But still, love or not, that kind of announcement will never do well for a cam model/member relationship (at least, if I’m the cam model in question!)

When this happened, I spent a lot of time on the internet reading stories on forums from men who had found themselves in the same situation – falling in love with a camgirl, and wanting to tell her about their feelings. Recurring themes from these posts include feeling like they were ‘hiding something big’ from the model, or feeling like their relationship with the model was something ‘special’ and feeling that, maybe, she felt the same way back. Honestly, there is only one reason I’d ever recommend telling a camgirl that you love her, but I’ll get to that later.

Why Shouldn’t I Tell a Camgirl I Love Her?

The majority of camgirls are there, primarily, for the money (the same reason anyone with a job goes to work), not to find love. Not to find ‘connection’, which is one of the reasons I know a lot of men use these websites. I would never say to anyone that the relationship they have with a camgirl isn’t ‘special’. Honestly, it’s so intriguing to me, the fact that the webcam culture has created entirely new types of relationships. I have personal experience that relationships between webcam models and members can be very special indeed.

But the relationships can be special to models without it evolving into ‘love’ or a romantic relationship. Obviously it’s not possible for me to say that no camgirl will ever fall for a member and want to take the relationship further. I’m sure that has happened in the past, and that it will happen in the future. It will be a rare occurrence, though – so much so that I’d say if you really believe the camgirl loves you back, let her tell you first.

Regarding the members who felt like they were ‘hiding’ something from the model… I’d say that perhaps those women may have better intuition than the members might think. Like I said, I saw it coming a long way off, and predicted that this particular member would tell me he loved me weeks and even months before he did. These strong feelings quite often come across quite plainly. I hoped he wouldn’t tell me, but alas, he did. He said he had to get it off his chest… But really, that was just putting all of that pressure and stress that he had felt… directly onto me instead.

So What Happens If I Do Tell Her?

As a camgirl, a member telling me that he loves me will never end well, and it would never be a wonderful thing that would make me happy to hear. Examples of how it would make me feel, however, include:

• Am I breaking his heart?
• Guilt.
• Am I taking advantage of him by still accepting tokens/gifts from him?
• More guilt.
• Have I led him on or caused him emotional harm?
• Guilt guilt guilt guilt guilt guilt guilt.
• Do I need to put an end to our friendship? What would be the easiest way to do that without hurting him more?
• Possibly the worst one… If I try to end the friendship, will he get obsessive/scary/start stalking me and being abusive?

So When SHOULD I Tell a Camgirl I Love her?

I have been considering writing this post for months, however, if I’d written it back when I’d first intended to, I would have just flat out said ‘never tell a camgirl that you love her’. However, I’ve experienced something in the meantime that has changed my mind, and now there is one reason why I would want a member from my cam room to tell me that they loved me.

If he was leaving.

If his feelings for me got too much, and they were starting to affect him negatively, and he decided that he simply had to distance himself for his own well-being.

In that case, I would appreciate a sincere conversation with that member.

“I’m sorry, I need to step back and stop coming to your room. You didn’t do anything wrong. In fact, maybe you did things too right. I have developed strong feelings for you, and I need to distance myself for my own well-being.”

Honestly, there’s nothing that shakes me in my camming career quite like a regular just disappearing. It’s happened to me a few times, and even though there could be many reasons why they stopped coming (they stopped visiting cam sites, they lost their job, it started causing problems in their real-life relationships, they were just simply too busy), as a person who quite often has low self-esteem, I would look past those potential reasons and blame myself – he got bored, I got boring, he found someone more interesting, I’m not cut out for this whole camming business if I can’t even keep my regulars interested, and so on.

So yes, for me, that would be the only time I would want to hear from a member that they loved me. Because I’d rather they tell me why, and say goodbye. Because, like I’ve said before, just because these types of relationships aren’t romantic to me, it doesn’t mean that they aren’t special.